you know, i'm having a feel sorry for myself moment. i don't usually do this, but once again the knife in my heart has been turned. lately, i have come to very unpleasant realizations about those close to me. things i thought to be true, really aren't. sometimes i feel used and abused which cause me to be so angry, but then at other times i feel so neglected that i often think that negative attention is better than no attention at all. it seems like every time i turn the corner, another "ugly reality" jumps out and attacks me. i have discussed this with a very loyal and trustworthy friend, because i often think i'm going insane. unfortunately, it is believed by others that this time, the cover depicts exactly what is in the book! what do i do now? so much time and energy and love has been invested and now i'm asking myself, what for? what's wrong with me? why didn't i see this one coming? usually i like to consider myself a fairly good judge of character, but not this time! this time, the books slipped right into the library, because of an inaccurate review!!! i hope i can learn from this mistake. i hate to judge people harshly, but i think i'm gonna have to.....for the sake of my own sanity!

before & after